Balance

Balance is a word that has popped up lately, whether it related to me or to others in my life. I now realize that balance has not played a part in my life in a long time. Sure we go to work and I really don’t know too many people that don’t have to. There was a time about 3-4 years ago where my whole life became about working. We were short-handed and I didn’t get to even start my job till 5:00 PM. I was back there on weekends when it was quiet to do letters and other things. It was all bad, I couldn’t sleep, I wasn’t eating right because of ordering dinner out all the time and it coincided with the start of menopause.  My life was out of balance, it brought me to my knees and my health suffered.

I was trying to manage my health naturally with herbs and supplements and it had worked until the stress set in. I knew exercise would help, but I didn’t have time. About a year later, I gave up and I went to the Hotze Clinic in Houston and they diagnosed me with low thyroid, severe adrenal fatigue and very low hormones. This clinic is one recommended by Suzanne Somers and they paid attention to every word I said and promised that I would feel better. It took several months and I did get my life back. Not 100% but so much better that I was very grateful. We finally hired someone at work that we wanted to keep and I wasn’t working weekends anymore and could go home at a decent time, I start to take care of myself again. I wanted to travel again and do things. I started to cook again and that is the one thing that I enjoy so much! Ah some balance! I dug back into school and finished my degree.  I was sleeping again, even if it was more than I ever did. What had changed is that I was not a morning person anymore and since I had been all my life I missed that. But life was good. Balance, smiling, laughter!

I remember when we moved into this house with our limited possessions how long it took to unpack everything and find a place for it. It took at least 6 weeks and every weekend I stayed home and worked to unpack the boxes while my husband was out playing golf. I guess he knew more about balance than I did. Now as I sift thru possessions, to pack up to leave,  I am finding that it is taking longer (well we do have a lot more stuff) and I am having to deal with my husbands’ impatience. Deciding whether something is important enough to take with me as I downsize or if it is something I will need down the road is hard since I have no clue where I will end up. Don’t you hate having to buy something twice. Well there is my answer. Leave it behind and buy it again if it’s that important. I am confused most of the time making these decisions so much harder. I have to be careful, not to let the stress get to me. I must take care of myself. I can’t and won’t let my health go downhill again. I am trying minute by minute to stay positive at this time of great change in my life. I am choosing healthy foods and making myself eat even when I’m not hungry. I am taking all my supplements. I am sleeping and have become a morning person again! I have reconnected with my good friends and formed connections with new people that have come into my life. I am spending time with them and enjoying myself as much as possible. I’m finally seeing light at the end of the tunnel and looking forward to my new life. Tomorrow is my birthday and I will not be packing, I have plans for a full day of fun! Cinco d Mayo is Saturday and I have the opportunity to follow different musicians all day. Since I love music and music is important therapy (sound therapy), I am grateful I have this opportunity.

Remember to seek balance in your life, take care of yourself. Nutrition, exercise (yes dancing counts), laughter, work, meditation, friends, learning, do it all without overdoing anything. I am working hard at balance thru this painful experience and I will say that by staying positive and practicing gratitude, it is a much better experience than it could be!

PS-I have been following a new blogger, Minimalist Living, and that has helped me see the things that I already knew in my heart about stuff. It doesn’t make you happy. Remember about the overflowing closets that you have to spend a weekend cleaning out. Well that’s not balance, is it.

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